Going home

It has been a long time since Independence Day. I say that because it was on the 4th of July that I boarded a plane and came to New Zealand. Tomorrow I board a plane and return to the US, and all I can say is that it has been a long time since the 4th of July.

It has been a long time since I waved goodbye to my parents at the airport, as the escalator descended into the subway. It has been a long time since I showed up in Palmerston North and they didn't even have a room ready for me. It has been a long time since I started classes, and thought they would be a breeze. It has been a long time since everyone I thought of as friends abandoned me and went to Wellington one weekend early on without even telling me. Since I met up with a crazy American named Jackie, and she invited me to her Christian small group. Since I went tramping with the alpine club. Since I first had to stay up all night to get some of the assignments done. And since I did a million other things which all defined my experiences here.

People ask me if I've had a good time in New Zealand. Of course I have, and of course I tell them that. I know that I most definitely have. And yet, such qualities are tough to measure. When I first left for New Zealand, I was very apprehensive to say the least. At times I wasn't even sure I wanted to go. And now, it is the eve of my return home and I can think of nowhere on Earth I would rather be than home. So if I barely wanted to go, and now I want to be home, how can I possibly say that I had a good time?

I believe the measure of my experience rests in the relationships and bonds I formed. Put aside my 'vacation' around the South Island for a moment. How I really measure and prove that my time in New Zealand was worthwhile was in how difficult it was to leave Palmerston North. The city itself was not very exciting, nor was the weather any good, but out of everything I have done in my entire trip, leaving Palmerston North was the hardest. It was so hard because I had to say so many goodbyes. I tried to deeply imprint the faces of all my friends in my mind so that I would not forget them. I would try to hang out with a group again, just so that some event would not be the last time I saw someone.

I guess what I am saying is that I am very excited to get home, but I will undoubtedly miss Palmerston North. And in someways, I can't even imagine what it will be like to return home.